


If Its Just You And Me

by gunslingaaahhh



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, First Time, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-19
Updated: 2013-06-19
Packaged: 2017-12-15 10:48:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/848639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gunslingaaahhh/pseuds/gunslingaaahhh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's taken them long enough, but eventually they got there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Its Just You And Me

**Author's Note:**

> I dont usually put lyrics in fic buuuuut Pandora deemed it to be so this time, sooo yeah.
> 
> Y'all know I love dat angsty angst.

_Like ships in the night_   
_You keep passing me by_   
_Just wasting time trying to prove who's right_   
_And if it all goes crashing into the sea_   
_**If its just you and me**_   
_Trying to find the light_   
_Like ships in the night_

 

~*~

 

Steve had a serious problem.

Most everything in his life was neat and orderly, had a place, had a solid definition and purpose. He had a routine that he stuck to, was able to easily ascertain what was going to happen in certain situations and then determine the correct course of action.

“Most” everything, because there was one thing, one very large _Danny_ shaped thing, that was neither neat nor orderly. That wasn’t to say it didnt have a place, of course, because it did. There was a purpose, too, and maybe a definition, but Steve was admitting to nothing.

His problem was that Danny’s place was beside him, at any point possible. At work, in the car, sitting out back in the Adirondack chairs on Steve’s beach. That was Danny’s place, had _been_ his place, unwaveringly, for over two years now. Very little had kept Danny from being by Steve’s side, which was leading Steve to have to rethink some of his definitions, mainly of words like “friendship” and “partners.”

And yet, here Steve sat, dead center of his couch, bowl of chili perched on his knees, alone. He was frowning so hard it was a wonder he didn’t tip over, running the facts through his head, over and over. It was chili night, which was also game night, two of Danny’s favorite things. Steve wasn’t usually adventurous in the kitchen, but he’d learned to make a SEAL team version of “firehouse chili” and it was pretty damn good. Good enough that one Danny Williams, connoisseur of all things food-related, gave it four gold stars.

(“Why just four?”

“Because, giving it five would only further inflate your ego, Steven, and it is huge enough already.”)

It didn’t add up. Huffing a breath, Steve gently set his bowl of chili on the coffee table and dug his phone out of his pocket, thumbing the screen and hitting Danny’s speed-dial (he was number one, followed by Mary, then Grace, then Kono and Chin. Not that he’d tell anyone this, obviously). It rang a few times before going to voicemail. Grumbling, Steve hung up and decided to send a text instead. His thumbs hovered over the screen, prepared to type, when the phone lit up with a message.

_”can i help u”_ came Danny’s text.

_”just wondering where u are, chili nite”_ Steve fired back, all ready to feel smug when Danny admitted to forgetting and rushing right over.

_”i kno; told u earlier i had plns w. chin”_

Steve frowned, brows deeply furrowed, before realization washed over him. Yes, Danny had mentioned something along those lines earlier, when Steve had asked him -- more out of habit than anything -- if Danny was coming over. The other man had apologized and said he’d made plans to take Chin out for drinks, said he’d needed a wingman.

A wave of disappointment, as well as slight embarrassment over forgetting, washed over him. He remembered nodding and agreeing and then had left, gone home to heat up the chili he’d made the night before, readying all of the appropriate accoutrements in individual bowls. He’d just... assumed, his brain totally deleting the fact that Danny had cancelled.

Steve startled when his phone buzzed, realizing he’d not replied to Danny’s last text.

_”did u 4get? sry man, nxt time”_ Danny had sent, the time-stamp ten minutes after his last message.

_”its fine. tell chin hi, and stay away from the wild turkey”_ Steve replied, tossing his phone onto the coffee table. He glanced at his bowl of chili, deciding he wasn’t really hungry anymore. Chili night wasn’t the same without Danny, not having him there had soured Steve’s stomach. He took his bowl to the kitchen, put some plastic wrap over the top and tucked it into the fridge. He could hear his phone buzz against the coffee table and sighed, going back into the living room to retrieve it.

”lol” was Danny’s reply, and Steve couldn’t help but smile; the phone the other man had was a lot easier to type on, but Danny still preferred to keep his messages as short and to the point as he could; if abbreviations were available, he used them.

He shut the TV off and took himself upstairs to bed; he didnt follow baseball like Danny did, only recorded the games because he knew the other man appreciated it. It was no fun to watch alone, not without Danny’s constant umpiring.

~*~

Whatever feelings Steve might’ve had the night before, increased ten-fold when Danny walked in, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed -- as did Chin -- and not at all like a man who’d spent the evening inside a bottle. This made Steve angry, slightly, like Danny should be paying for his cancellation of chili night with the hangover from hell.

“How’d it go last night?” he asked, going for nonchalant.

“Uh, fine, had some wings, a few beers, the usual,” Danny replied, shrugging. “I asked about the wild turkey, and Chin had no idea what you were talking about.”

Steve clenched his jaw. “He and my dad used to drink it after bad cases, terrible hangovers.”

Danny nodded but said nothing else, the both of them making their way over to the surface table when Kono announced that they had a case. Once there was work to focus on, Steve almost forgot about the fact that Danny cancelled their long standing plans to hang out with Chin.

Almost.

He wanted to chalk it up to a fluke, but wasn’t sure if he could; Danny and Chin ended up pairing off for most of the day, while Kono worked the phones and Steve did his Naval intelligence thing with the computer. It wasn’t like he and Danny hadnt split off before, but usually it was _his_ decision when it happened, not Danny’s.

_Whatever_ , he thought, shaking himself slightly. _You’re being a little girl about this, relax._

And he tried, he really did. But it soon became a thing, where the _only_ time Steve saw Danny outside of work was chili night. He stopped bringing Grace over on weekends, and while he said it was because the little girl was making her own plans with kids her age, Steve couldnt help but wonder if Danny was making excuses.

Chili night had taken on a weird, strained tone, like Danny was just coming over to be polite. Steve didn’t want polite, he wanted _Danno_ , loudly umpiring a pre-recorded baseball game like the players could hear him through the TV set. He wanted Danny to punch him in the shoulder and groan about how this, _this_ chili was the best by far, last week’s couldn’t compare, babe, oh my god.

He wanted Danny. Just Danny, all to himself, whenever he could get him. And that, _that_ was his problem.

Danny was spending less and less time hanging out with Steve as friends, wasnt bringing Grace over... had he done something? If Danny had a problem with anything Steve did, he told him at length and with great gusto. Was Danny seeing someone? Gabby was out of the picture, and Steve was relatively sure the other man would tell him if he’d suddenly started dating (someone that wasnt Steve) again.

In a perfect world, Steve could have asked Danny what was keeping him so busy that he wasn’t coming over for beers or ballgames or playtime with Grace, but actually knowing the answer made Steve want to vomit, so he decided to track Danny’s phone signal instead. He couldn’t do this from home, of course, so he stayed late at the office one night, feigning needing to look into something, and wished the rest of his team a good evening.

Once gone, he activated the tracking program he’d installed in the teams’ cell-phones in the event anyone was kidnapped. Danny’s phone -- a little red blinky light -- popped up on the screen, traveling away from HQ. Steve watched it go, mouse held in a deathgrip. He watched little addresses and street names pass by, until Danny’s light stopped moving; he’d reached his destination. Steve hovered the mouse and was relieved to see that it was Danny’s home address. Feeling like a dick, he went to close out of the program when Danny’s light started moving again. Confused, Steve watched it go until it came to another stop, this time right alongside Chin -- a green blinky light. The address that came up was Chin’s house.

Staring at the screen, Steve wracked his brain before typing in the keystrokes that would bring up a log of Danny’s whereabouts for the last few weeks. Chewing a thumbnail, Steve’s heart sank when he saw that eighty percent of Danny’s destination log was Chin’s address. He was sure if he went back a few months, that address would be his.

Slumping back into his chair, Steve’s mind began spinning out scenarios. Had Chin and Danny suddenly become best friends, a term Steve only held in regard to Danny and himself? Were they planning something secret and not telling him? A quick check showed Kono’s blinky light -- blue -- was safely at home. Not planning something that major then... were they seeing each other? In all the years Steve had known Chin, he’d never, _ever_ gotten the idea the older man swung both ways. He’d have known, he would’ve been able to _tell_.

Of course, Chin was still grieving the loss of Malia, and grief does strange things to people sometimes, including a change in preferences; “any port in a storm,” and all that. Steve’s stomach turned at the idea of Danny just being a warm body, even if it was to help a friend.

But what if... what if they _were_ seeing each other? There were no fraternization rules for Five-0, not like in HPD, so it was entirely possible. Although, from Steve’s vantage point, if Danny was going to go for one of them, it’d be him. They were so close, had gotten very close over the last couple of years, and Steve had had the feeling for a while that--

Maybe he’d misread things, maybe Danny _was_ just overly friendly. Maybe he _wasn’t_ interested in Steve like that. But if that was the case, how could he explain away the Pro Bowl thing, or the Korea thing, or any of the things, really. No, Steve was missing something huge, here, and the idea that maybe he should’ve said something to Danny sooner, should’ve just manned-the-fuck-up and _told him_ how he was feeling earlier was looming large. He’d waited too long, Danny was looking for companionship elsewhere, he’d decided he wasn’t going to wait for Steve to sort out his pig-pen full of issues.

It was a good thing Steve was alone in his office, he wouldn’t have wanted anyone to see him crying.

~*~

Kono was the first one in the next morning, looking as fresh-faced and beautiful as always. As she passed Steve’s office, she paused, frowning.

“Uh, boss? You ok?” she called, stepping lightly into the office. “Steve?”

Steve was slumped over his desk, asleep, the side of his face smushed into the ink blotter. Kono reached out a hand to tap him on the shoulder, and jerked it back at the last second when Steve suddenly sat up ram-rod straight.

“Huh? What? … Kono? What... what time is it?”

She glanced at her watch, concern evident on her face. “A little before eight. Boss, did you... sleep here? What were you working on?”

Steve checked his own watch and confirmed the time with a groan. Yanking open a drawer, he pulled out his stash of t-shirts and ripped open a package, whipping off the old one and tugging on the new. “Yeah, I... must’ve dozed off. Shit, I never do that.”

“Was it a case? I know you said you were doing some research...”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, just some personal stuff, with my mom, you know. Just, uh, don’t tell Danny ok? He gets all indignant when I don’t let him know about all things mom related.”

Kono nodded, obviously skeptical, but kept it to herself. “Sure, I won’t say anything... by the way, Chin called me on my way over, he and Danny are car-pooling this morning. I guess the bike has a flat and the SUV is in the shop? So they’ll be a little late.”

The look on his face must’ve been pretty extreme, because Kono did a double-take. “Um... oook, I’m sure I’m going to regret asking this but: is everything ok? With you and Danny and Chin, I mean.”

Steve tried to recompose his face into something less ‘oh my god what the fuck’ and more ‘yes quite how droll.’ “Why wouldn’t things be ok?”

“I dunno, maybe because at the mention of Danny and Chin carpooling, you looked like you were on the verge of a coronary event?” Kono replied, eyebrow arched. “You’ve been acting weird any time they pair off lately as it is, so I kind of had to assume there’s an issue.”

Slumping back into his chair, Steve scrubbed at his face, stubble rasping against his palms. Should he ask her? Would she even know anything?”

“You wouldn’t know if, um... if maybe they... uh... are they... a thing?” he asked, still hiding behind his hands. There was silence, and for a moment Steve thought Kono had just left, turned around and walked out of the office. Lowering his hands, he found her staring at him instead, practically gawking.

“A thing? What do you-- a thing? Like what, _dating?_ ”

Steve cringed. “Um... kind of?”

“I’m pretty sure I’d know if my cousin suddenly turned gay, Steve. I’m also pretty sure Danny isn’t interested in him, either.”

“So why is Danny spending so much time with him?” Steve blurted, instantly mortified. He watched Kono shake her a head, eyes softening as she sat down on the other side of the desk.

“You’re jealous. Don’t bother trying to deny it, it’s all over your face, Boss. Danny is a great guy, he’s been there for Chin through this whole grieving process; I guess Chin was having a rough time starting a few weeks ago, and since there are some things that as a family member I cannot provide, Danny stepped up. He’s just been trying to keep Chin busy, make sure he gets out of the house and does things.”

Shame crept into Steve’s belly, hot and sour; of course, because Kono was right, Danny was a good person and was helping out a friend. He’d gotten upset because Danny was trying to do the right thing by their teammate.

“Oh,” he said, voice small.

Kono cocked her head to the side, considering. “You were worried they were a thing... why? Personally I don’t think Chin’s ready for the dating scene quite yet, and Danny really got burned by Gabby, so I’m sure he’s not itching to get back out there. Is it because Danny hasn’t been hanging out with you?”

“It’s just... if he’s not home or with Grace... or even when he _is_ with Grace sometimes, he’s with me. And all of sudden he... wasn’t. I thought maybe he’d... found... someone. Or something. Or... that I’d done something. But usually he tells me when I’ve done something and he hasn’t even done that.”

“So your first assumption after that was that he and Chin are an item? What the heck, Boss,” Kono snorted, grinning. “Everyone knows you and Danny are an old married couple, if he’s going to end up with a guy, I’m almost positive it’d be you.”

Steve felt the color drain from his face; she said it like it was obvious, that Steve being into guys was a well known thing.

“He’s straight,” he tried, though according to the expression on Kono’s face, it was a weak argument.

“Uh huh, and I’m Barbara Walters. My suggestion is that you talk to Danny yourself,” Kono offered by way of excusing herself, which was right when Danny and Chin strolled into the bull-pen.

“Talk to me about what?” Danny asked, looking from one to the other. “Are you guys practicing your terror-twins act again? Because I really, really want no part in that.”

Kono gave Steve a pointed look before grabbing Chin by the arm and dragging him into her office. Danny shrugged and made his way into Steve’s office, sitting on the couch and propping his legs up. When Steve quirked an eyebrow at him, Danny made a grand “you want to talk, talk” gesture.

Unable to find the words for a moment, they stared at each other, Danny looking like he was pretty damn comfortable and content to sit on that couch until Steve said something for himself. It was his patient, I’m-a-dad-and-a-cop posture, and right then Steve hated it.

“I... um. Ok... so you’ve been hanging out with Chin, a lot, and--”

Danny held up a hand, silencing Steve, before standing and moving towards the door. He shut it, then drew the blinds around the entire office before taking his seat and gesturing for Steve to continue.

“And... I wanted to know what was up with that,” he finished lamely, shrinking into his seat.

“What is up with that? What, I can’t have any other friends but you?” Danny asked, arms waving. “Last time I checked, you don’t own me. Ok, maybe when we’re on the clock you might, since I’m usually trapped in a car with you, but off-hours? Oh no, my friend, do not get it twisted.”

“You always spent most of your free-time with me,” Steve pointed out, trying to be helpful.

“Yes, because I didn’t know anyone else. Chin and I are buds, we’ve connected on a deeper level than car chases and gunfights. Also? He doesn’t almost get me killed on a daily basis, I’m thinking we need to rethink this partners thing--”

At that point Steve’s hearing blocked out, giving him nothing but static. Danny couldn’t possibly be saying what he was saying... could he? He didn’t want to even be partners anymore, either? Steve felt like his brain was hiccuping, unable to process that thought. He felt a hand on the back of his neck, pushing his head down between his knees, vaguely heard Danny anxiously telling him to breathe, take deep breathes, do you have a paper bag.

The hand remained where it was, but Danny moved into a crouch, looking Steve right in the eyes. “Babe... what is the matter? What is happening right now?”

“You don’t want to be with me anymore,” Steve mumbled, the words tumbling over each other on their way out of his mouth. “I don’t know what I did but if you tell me I can fix it and then we can be partners again--”

“Whoa, slow down there, big guy. Who said you did anything? I’d have told you if you’d done something, you know that. And why wouldnt we be partners anymore?”

Steve blinked at him. “You just said--”

“I was kidding!” Danny’s arms pinwheeled. “Jesus Tapdancing Christ, I was kidding, you had this look on your face, I was just teasing. I could never do that to Kono, she’d kill me if she got stuck with you.”

There was still that too tight, can’t breathe feeling in Steve’s chest, and a pinched look to his face, if Danny’s worried expression was anything to go on.

“Steve, really, what’s going on? I know we haven’t been doing our normal thing, but I figured it was ok because I was doing a thing for a friend... it isn’t like we were never gonna hang out again.”

Taking a deep breathe, Steve exhaled heavily through his nose. “Felt that way to me... when you stopped bringing Grace over...”

Danny hung his head at that, sighing deeply. “Yeah, about that... she’s got a lot of friends, and they all wanna do things, y’know? Hang out and be pre-teen girls. As much as I’d rather her spend time with me, I can’t very well tell her no, can I? So I let her make plans on the weekends to hang out with her little girlfriends. It’s usually a movie or a few hours at the mall, nothing big. Evidently her being over at your house meant a lot more to you than I realized... I’m sorry, I never meant to take anything away from you.”

Moving to stand, Steve watched the other man wince as he stretched his legs, bad knee stiffening from being in one position for so long.

“It has never been my intention to take anything from you,” he said quietly.

Steve frowned. “I dont know what you mean.”

“I mean that... you’ve lost a lot already, and I never had any desire to join the ranks of people who left you, or took things from you, things like trust, or hope, or joy, or-- love,” Danny finished, tripping over that last.

“If anything you’ve given me those things, Danno... most of them, anyway.”

Grinning slightly even as his cheeks pinked, Danny shrugged. “You could have the last thing too, you know. I mean, isn’t it obvious? I’ve only been in love with you for the last... oh... three years? And I don’t think I’m alone in that... unless I am reading this completely wrong.”

That can’t breathe feeling was back, but this time for an entirely different, entirely more incredible reason. Before he could give Danny a chance to back-pedal, Steve surged out of his chair and wrapped his arms around Danny’s shoulders, pressing their lips together. He whimpered at the first contact, finally having something he’d wanted so badly but was afraid to even think about, let alone ask for.

Danny must’ve sensed this, he started chuckling against Steve’s lips, hands skimming under Steve’s shirt, fingertips grazing over warm, smooth skin. Pulling back, he grinned up at Steve’s bewildered, goofy face. “I don’t know what took us so fucking long, but I’m so done waiting, if you are.”

So happy he thought he’d burst, Steve dipped down and gave Danny another long, deep kiss, savoring the other man’s taste, memorizing the soft sounds Danny made against his mouth.

He figured that was answer enough.

 

-FIN-


End file.
